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Who voted her in? RICHMOND, VA — Governor Abigail “Spamburger” Spanberger beamed with pride Tuesday as she signed a bill that finally frees Virginia’s electors from the pesky burden of listening to actual Virginians.The new law, part of the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact, means the state’s 13 electoral votes will now go to whichever Democrat wins the national popular vote — even if every single Virginian votes Republican and writes “TRUMP” in lipstick on their ballots.“This is a beautiful expansion of democracy,” Spanberger told reporters while carefully not looking at any actual Virginians in the room. “Why should your silly little state votes matter when the real power is in California, New York, and Chicago? We’re just making sure every voice is heard… except yours.”Republican lawmakers called the move “the most honest thing Democrats have done in years,” noting it finally admits what everyone already knew: when the Electoral College doesn’t deliver the desired result, it must be abolished by any means necessary.At press time, Spanberger was reportedly working on a follow-up bill requiring all future Virginia elections to be decided by a coin flip in San Francisco.