This is from 10 years ago. Our granddaughter was 5 at the time.
Best comment of the day belongs to our granddaughter, Casey. So, there's this stuffed doll here (at Disneyland). It's one princess, un... View MoreThis is from 10 years ago. Our granddaughter was 5 at the time.
Best comment of the day belongs to our granddaughter, Casey. So, there's this stuffed doll here (at Disneyland). It's one princess, until you flip her upside down. Then, there's another princess hiding under the skirt of the first one. You just flip the skirt to reveal her. Creepy, right?? Well. Her mother wouldn't let Casey buy one (they're also $33).
On the way to dinner, a little girl gets in the elevator with us, and she has one of these dolls. Casey points to the girl and says, NICE and loud, "Mommy, look! She has one of the creepy dolls!"
Truly hilarious. Enjoy!
A boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?”
The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask yo... View MoreTruly hilarious. Enjoy!
A boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?”
The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.”
So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!”
The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I love Brad Pitt, and I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?”
The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy”
The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically’?”
The boy replied, "Yes, ‘potentially' you and I are sitting on three million dollars, but 'realistically' we're living with two hookers and a future politian."
I found this one in Irish Facts… but couldn’t share it. Enjoy!
• I once dated a girl with a twin and people always asked me how I could tell them apart. It was simple, Alison painted her nails red, a... View MoreI found this one in Irish Facts… but couldn’t share it. Enjoy!
• I once dated a girl with a twin and people always asked me how I could tell them apart. It was simple, Alison painted her nails red, and Bob had a beard.
• Pro Tip #22: Ring your own doorbell on your way to bed. This will clear the dogs off the bed.
• I went to an Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting. Anonymous my eye. I knew everyone there !!
• In a society that has you counting money, kilos, calories, and steps, be a rebel and count your ‘blessings' instead.
• I just asked myself if I'm crazy, and 'We all said No'.
• Don't worry about 'getting old'. Worry about 'thinking old'.
• You can do a hundred things right and someone will always point out the ONE thing you did wrong.
• Being a 'little older', I am very fortunate to have someone call and check on me everyday. He is from India and he is very concerned about someone scamming me and hacking into my Computer/Banking details. He is always helpful and asks for my Password to fix my problem.
• After that 'Covid thing' these past few years, my 'going out' clothes have missed me so much. I put them on and they hugged me so tightly, I could barely breathe.
• I told my wife she should 'embrace her mistakes'...............She gave me a hug.
• A Genie granted me one wish, so I said "I just want to be happy". So now I'm living in a little cottage with 6 dwarves and working in a mine. 'whistle while you work…
..'and finally......
• I took my 8 year old daughter to the office on 'take your kid to work day'. But when we walked into the office she started to cry. As concerned staff gathered around I asked her what was wrong and she said: "Daddy where are all the clowns you said you worked with?”
The Palisades are still a wasteland wrapped in red tape — a year after Los Angeles promised to help rebuild
Pacific Palisades — once one of the most sought-after neighborhoods in Los Angeles, home to celebs like Tom Hanks and Ben Affleck — still looks like a war-zone a year after wildfires leveled much of i
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