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TEHRAN — Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei was killed today in a U.S.-Israeli precision strike, finally earning the 72 virgins promised to martyrs in paradise.According to multiple sources with direct access to the afterlife, Khamenei has officially obtained the full reward. Photos emerging from Jannah show the beaming leader proudly posing with his new harem — a large herd of bewildered goats who appear deeply unimpressed by the whole arrangement.“Alhamdulillah! My patience has been rewarded!” the Ayatollah reportedly exclaimed moments after arrival, right before one of the virgins began chewing his turban. Paradise officials have confirmed there is no clerical error; these are, in fact, the correct virgins.Scholars at the Islamic University of Goat Studies are calling it “a beautiful fulfillment of scripture.”At press time, the Supreme Leader was last seen trying to teach the goats to chant “Death to America.”Reported by Gabe Owners, TDS News