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BREAKING: A New York City watchdog group organized by Citizen Journalist Nick Shirley has uncovered a "free grocery store" scam that is raking in millions for the Mamdani family. According to the group, Mamdani's brother, Eli Mohammed Mamdani, has been buying decrepit old buildings from the city for next to nothing. "The plan was simple," said local Shirley Watchdog Chapter leader Joseph Barron, "The mayor's brother buys condemned property from the city for pennies on the dollar, then he sells it right back for the 'free grocery store' program at market value." Once the city has the property it already owned, Mamdani hires his cousin Rufus Theodore Mamdani's construction company to bring it up to code. "All told, each store could rake in as much as $5 million for the Mamdani family." That's how communism works.