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MINNEAPOLIS, MN — “It’s about keeping dangerous people out of our neighborhoods!” declared Phillip Macrotch, a fervent progressive activist, as he heaved another tire onto the makeshift barricade he’d constructed from recycled protest signs and artisanal kombucha crates. The structure, dubbed “The People’s Partition,” now stands tall enough to deter even the most determined immigration enforcer from entering his upscale Minneapolis enclave.Gabe Owners of TDS News caught up with Macrotch mid-construction. “So you think it’s a good idea to build a wall and control who is allowed to enter your neighborhood?” Owners asked, dodging a flying vegan leather boot.“Well, of course,” Macrotch replied, wiping sweat from his brow with a fair-trade bandana. “We can’t just allow dangerous, unvetted people to move into our neighborhoods. That’s just common sense.”Owners pressed further: “But you think the wall at the southern border of the United States is a bad thing?”Macrotch paused, adjusting his “No Borders, No Walls” bumper sticker on the barricade. “That’s different,” he insisted. “We should allow anyone who wants to enter the United States to come in. Borders are just imaginary lines drawn by colonizers!”As ICE vans reportedly circled the block, honking in futile protest, Macrotch’s neighbors cheered from behind their new defenses, sipping lattes and chanting slogans about inclusivity—for everyone except federal agents, apparently.TDS News will continue monitoring this developing story, or at least until the barricade blocks our Wi-Fi signal.