photo #8839111

Friends. Neighbors. Citizens of the snack aisle.We need to talk about belts.Not politically.Not spiritually.Functionally.A few nights ago, sometime before 9:00 pm, inside the Marathon gas station on Victory Drive, five strangers accidentally attended a live demonstration in applied physics.Fluorescent lights buzzing like they've seen things. Beef jerky staring in judgment. Receipts warming up like they sensed history.At the counter stood a young man.Clean outfit. Fresh shoes. Confidence fully charged. A belt threaded through the loops like it passed inspection.And yet-The pants were sagging.Not casually.Aggressively.Like gravity had seniority and a clipboard.I stood behind him in line. Silent. Observant. Then, gently. Respectfully. Civilian calm."Hey man... are you gonna use that belt, bro?"💥💥💥The store lost its mind.The cashier folded like a lawn chair.Customers wheezed.Someone near the coolers made a noise I've only heard at funerals and comedy clubs.Even the energy drink fridge rattled like it wanted in.The young man turned around, confused but brave."Why does it bother you?""It doesn't," I said."I'm just asking a question."Pause.⏸️Because there was no insult.No lecture.No politics.Just a question.And an entire room realizing the belt was currently cosplaying as a suggestion.Receipts printed.Pants remained in open rebellion.The belt stayed decorative.So let this serve as a friendly community reminder:Belts are not jewelry.They are not vibes.They are not emotional support loops.Belts have one job.And when they actually do it, society functions slightly better for everyone involved.WE WOULD ALL GREATLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU USED YOUR BELT.Your pants will thank you.Gravity will relax.Strangers at Marathon will stop laughing mid-transaction.That's all, neighbors.Happy Friday.👖