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WHEN SOMEONE IS GRIEVING1. Don't DENY them the grieving process even if you think you would do it differently. Let them grieve. Let them go through the hurt, let them cry, let them pull the cover's up over their head and stay in bed all day, let them mourn. Don't try to slow it down or speed it up.2. Don't DISCOURAGE them with critical words or negative comments. If it isn't edifying then just pray. 3. Don't DIMINISH what they are going through even if you handled it better when you went through it in your life. I am learning that you can get past it but you never get over it.4. Don't DICTATE how they should or shouldn't grieve or how long they should or shouldn't grieve. Unless they are violating clear Scriptural commands then just let them work through it. If you see them violating a clear command of scripture then go to them privately, gently, lovingly and sincerely.5. Don't DESERT them. Even when it looks like they are doing OK or moving on with their life it doesn't mean that they are not still hurting and they need you just like they did when they we're at the grave side. In fact as more time separates them from the death you may find they need you more, but just in a different way.6.Don't DROP them from your prayer list even if you don't hear from them as much as when their love one died. They still need your prayers.7. DON'T DOUBT their pain, hurt, sadness or Love for their loved one just because you see them smile and because they seem happy. You never know what is behind a happy face. You can't see the facial expressions of the heart.8. Don't DEMAND them to follow your idea of how someone should grieve. Don't DEMAND them to take your advice. Just because they don't doesn't mean they aren't listening to you. In grieving I am finding that sometimes processing things is in slow motion.9. Don't DROWN them with too much Scripture at one time. Please understand I have been guilty of this. Yes the Bible is what they need but not all of it all at once. It is easy to be overwhelmed. 10. Don't DISSECT their lives. People who are grieving will be depressed, they may be quiet, they may seem overly happy or may not feel like talking. They may take a trip or make changes. But don't overly judge every move they make. They may vent, even on Facebook, they may say something that seems out of character for them. They have to find a new normal in their lives. They have to get their emotional and mental "sea legs" back. These are ten things I failed in the past to realize, when dealing with the grieving. Now I am on this side I see it differently.