photo #1922347

I suppose it started yesterday morning. I was having my coffee outside with lemon dunkers. George scampered up and wanted me to get him some coffee. I laughed, and told him he was squirrely enough, and could use more exercise than coffee. I broke off a piece of dunker, and tossed it to him and he SLAPPED ME ! Then, it started. George ran off. After what seemed an eternity of cackling cacaphony, things got quiet. Too quiet. When I went to find out why, I was attacked by a firestorm of pinecones. Yeah, it made me mad. I went inside to cool off. I turned on Little House and the TV said "no signal". Very rare except in rainstorms. I went outside, and the antenna had been turned, and there were like six vines hanging from it. I had to go get the extension ladder, climbed it, and started untangling the vines. Next thing I knew, I was attacked again! I avoided falling off the ladder and got the antenna pointed correctly again before I came down and put away the ladder. I went into the shop and got a handful of nuts, washers, and lock washers. I went into the house, and charged up my old blunderbuss. This was it. I primed the pan and went to seal George's fate. I finally found him, and ended things once and for all. I skint him, and pieced him up. I soaked him in salt water, then marinated him in applejack. Then, I grilled that pachyderm with Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ sauce to perfection. With some homemade slaw and tater salad, he's gonna go down real good while he lasts. Of course this is an April fools joke. That old Curmudgeon could NEVER get me! This is admin George, and we just got done barbecuing the Curmudgeon, though we ran out of sauce!