College Football

Public Group - Sports - 9 Members

Group Info

Woody Wood

Founder

Wall Comment

Woody Wood

November 2, 2021 11:24 pm

Why college football is better then the NFL: What if I told you that there was a special teams coach named Jeff Banks who went to Alabama but then when Sark left for Texas, he went with Sark. He also... View MoreWhy college football is better then the NFL: What if I told you that there was a special teams coach named Jeff Banks who went to Alabama but then when Sark left for Texas, he went with Sark. He also in the process left his wife, married or at least got with a stripper, we do not know if they're married or not, but he is with a stripper, she is famous in her own right, her name is Pole Assassin. And so Jeff Banks and Pole Assassin are hanging out there in Austin, and they decide like any stripper and football coach would do, to have trick or treaters over. And they do. Here's where the story gets really weird. Pole Assassin has a monkey that is also trained to perform with her. And this is where it gets really really weird, they have trick or treaters over and Pole Assassin's monkey just goes after one of the kids and apparently bit it. And then there are varying degrees of stories about how deep the wound was and how long it took to pry the monkey's jaws off the kid. But that would make a great story if that's where it ended. It's not, friends. So then Pole Assassin once the story goes public last night, on the only platform fit for such a story, twitter.com, Pole Assassin goes on the offensive. At first she said it didn't happen. And then Pole Assassin says ... essentially she threw the kid under the bus, you know, bloody stump of a hand and all. She throws the kid under the bus and says, well, the kid was trespassing. Shame on that kid, by the way, trespassing, you ought to know better at 10 or 11-years-old on Halloween. And so the Pole Assassin's emotional support monkey was essentially built up to be a villain but then she made it a victim and the monkey has not commented on this at all yet, nor has the kid, nor has the kid's parents. Then Pole Assassin has BS called on her, and she's not going to stand for that, or dance for it for that matter. So then she takes her cell phone, her I-pole if you will, and she starts recording herself walking through her backyard (again all this happened last night) recording herself walking through her backyard, and she walks up to a gate. On this gate is a sign that says "Do not enter: emotional support monkey blah blah blah" and it's on the fence and it looks pretty freshly painted. I cannot vouch for the authenticity and how long that sign had been there, but she posted a video of her walking up to this gate that had do not enter written on it and the caption said "Proof" as if that was vindication. As if she was in a court of law and she said "Look Here's a gate that has a do not enter sign on it that I drew." It's not one that you bought from Walmart. It was hand drawn "do not enter". Some of the letters were lower case, some of the letters were capitalized. I'm not going to get into grammatical inaccuracies here. You do you, Pole Assassin do Pole Assassin, and monkey do monkey, monkey bite kid, whomst amongst us hasn't been there. So anyway, then, a lot of people start piling on, as you tend to do when a stripper starts to try and vindicate her rabid monkey biting a trick-or-treater at the Special Teams Coordinator's house because there was a "Do Not Enter" sign that was hand drawn. Again, whomst amongst us. So then, she starts deleting, but the problem is it's already been captioned and captured and everything in between and everyone spread it all over the place. So now we wake up this morning, on Tuesday November 2nd, the Year of our Lord 2021, and we're no closer to finding the solution. And we're no closer to getting the real story. So that's what happened last night. I thought to myself these poor people who only watch the NFL never get anything like this. The NFL is such a sterile environment. Everything is made to be equal, everything is so rigid, the taunting penalties are a joke in the NFL by the way. But you never get stripper monkeys going after trick-or-treaters in the NFL. And that's one of my biggest problems with pro football. College football, anything can happen.

View Less

Be the first person to like this.

Members

Woody Wood

Barry S Blevins

Brian Doyle

Bungholio